“Fact five. People from France have the largest recorded average penis size at just above six inches.”
“Fact four, impotence is actually on legal grounds for divorce in some parts of Unova…
“Fact three, some men are actually born with two dicks, although only a hundred or so worldwide and it probably isn’t a good thing.”
“Oh, and, 3, 361, 901, 512 men are lying if they say they need extra large condoms. That’s 94% of the male population you shouldn’t believe.”
“Damn good thing I don’t like alcohol.”
“Oh Kuro… when you get older, you’ll understand you don’t always drink alcohol because you like it.”
“Fun fact, too much alcohol will make you go limp; think twice about having sex whilst drunk, kiddies.”
Sitting in front of your door is a basket with brownies in it. They look pretty delicious, but little did you know they have weed cooked inside of it, the taste hidden by the deliciousness of the brownie.
On the side of the basket there’s a note that reads, “Got these for you and Cheren, I bought some for me and Bianca too, they’re really good. Bianca misses you guys.. A lot so.. I was hoping maybe this could work to see about you two coming to visit, if not it’s alright. — Hue.”
At first, he’s kind of worried that this is going to turn out like one of those movies, a baby showing up at his door in basket fashion, ready to weep any moment now and smell of feces from the night before, but oddly enough, it smells nice. He isn’t sure that, when having finally crouched down to peek under the roof of the cradle, he was expecting a good sort of brown, or if he was just plain disappointed that it hadn’t been a baby. Not that Cheren would have let him keep it — no way in hell, but either way, they’re brownies, and it’s sort of suspicious until he finds the note.
… Well, then. Surely enough this is progress, if that’s even the correct term for finally hearing something from your two best friends, who was in fact one, since he doubted Bianca had any clue this had been delivered, but he was willing to pretend for the sake of feeling better about the gift. His eyes are concrete on the paper for just a little longer, reading words over and over until he got sick of Hue’s horrible cursive font, and he quickly slipped it back beneath the woven lid. Looking left, right, as though clearing the road for traffic, Touya lifted the loop into his arm, sighing whilst digging his jacket up to his forearm and beginning to type at his X-transceiver.
[ TEXT ] Honestly, I’d be all for visiting, but Cheren? I don’t think it’s going to happen. He’s still paranoid enough as it is without seeing you two… no offense, but you know, he’s shaken up even though it’s been weeks. Thanks for the brownies, I’ll get back to you on how bad they are.
If I owe you a reply, and you see me on, but I didn’t respond these are the reasons:
- I am so un-quality, that I just don’t know what to type.
- I want it to be perfect.
- I’m working on it.
- I lost it because Tumblr is stupid.
- Might be mobile at the time.
- I just can’t even with my feels right now.
- I am just so stupid that I just don’t know how to respond.
Here aren’t the reasons:
- I just hate you.